"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." --MLK Jr.
what if humans have cheat codes like if you jump 14 times and then punch + kick ok awesome now i can walk on water and do calculus
So this past weekend I was at a house party and happened to see the single most miserably neglected fish I have ever seen in my life. The water had an opaque layer of something that looked kind of like grease on top and the single fish inside was listless and shrivelled. It smelled FOUL and the guy hosting the party said that they had noticed the fish being kind of stupid since they had changed the water last time (which must have been like a fucking year ago) by just running the tub into the tank.
Being full of whiskey and compassion(?), I naturally decided that the fish was now mine and reached into that disgusting cesspool with a ziplock bag, took the fish home, cackling to myself because what I was doing was just so weird.
The next day I went out and got a tank, like, I dropped 100$ for a stolen goldfish that cost 4.38$ at PetSmart. I went to a locally owned small pet shop called Paws N’ Jaws and the woman there was super helpful and even gave me some free plants with the tank. Ended up being up til like 2 in the morning with school the next day at 8 setting the stupid thing up, panicking about dechlorinating the water etc etc.
These are his new digs, live plants, snaily companions. He’s perked up A LOT since being moved to an environment that actually has oxygen in the water, and has shown marked improvement in his ability to eat. For the first day or so, his motor skills appeared to be completely fucked up and he had a hard time swimming and eating, he would suck up food and then just spit it right back out. Now he’s having a great time, eating well harassing the snails, trying to eat the plants and zipping around the tank for no apparent reason like a moron, but a happy moron. I really enjoy watching him.. or her.
Admittedly I might have done this even if I had been sober, but I like to think this is proof that not ALL decisions made when drunk are bad ones. I regret nothing.
You are a lovely human being. <3
YOU WENT TO A HOUSE PARTY AND STOLE A GOLDFISH OH MY GOD THAT’S THE BEST DRUNKEN STORY I’VE EVER HEARD
this makes me happy
+10 points to Hufflepuff
So I morphed every main male character from the Superwholock shows (list below) and this is what happened. Tumblr, here is your man.
(Sherlock, John, Mycroft, Lestrade, Moriarty, (Not Anderson), Cas, Dean, Sam, 9, 10, 11 and Rory.)
oh lord. he’s beautiful.
Augustus Waters was a self-aggrandizing bastard. But we forgive him. We forgive him not because he had a heart as figuratively good as his literal one sucked, or because he knew more about how to hold a cigarette than any nonsmoker in history, or because he got eighteen years when he should've gotten more.
I'm assuming you've got some time, you interupting bastard.
I'm telling you, Augustus Waters talked so much that he'd interrupt you at his own funeral. And he was pretentious: Sweet Jesus Christ, that kid never took a piss without pondering the abundant metaphorical resonances of human waste production. And he was vain: I do not believe I have ever met a more physically attractive person who was more acutely aware of his own physical attractiveness.
But I will say this: When the scientists of the future show up at my house with robot eyes and they tell me to try them on, I will tell the scientists to screw off, because I do not want to see a world without him.
#can we just stop and appreciate Harry’s face in this scene? #I mean, he’s literally waiting for someone to say something about Hermione’s blood status #she’s the only Muggleborn in the slug club full of purebloods and well known people #and Harry’s there just like “say something I dare you” #and if you look at her face, you can see the actual hesitation and somewhat fear of what will happen next after telling of her parents occupation #Harry truly is acting like Hermione’s big brother, which I absolutely love #i just adore this scene
I love that Neville looks genuinely interested in what hermione’s talking about.
Harry: I wish a motherfucka would talk shit right now
Say something, make my day
An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great.
(This is transparent btw)
While the DisneyBound Prom King/Queen Fashion Challenge may not be for you, maybe this one is more up your alley!
In honour of Disney’s Star Wars Weekends, submit a photo of yourself DisneyBounding as your favorite Star Wars character by Thursday, June 6th to email@example.com.
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